Copypasta

Absolutely disgusting. I will never be with a female who defecates. The whole reason my last girlfriend and I split was because I found out she did, in fact, poop. For months I had suspected something suspicious. Every time we had ethnic cuisine, she would act very odd, especially afterwards. I would try to cuddle with her and fondle her, only to have my advances rejected and her leaving the room. It all came to a head one day when I came home early from work. As usual I wanted to take my shower, but there on the couch, was my girlfriend pleading with me to wait a bit before I cleansed myself. Well, fuck that. I wasn't going to wait another second to purify myself under my brand new showerhead. It then got even more strange. The closer I got to the bathroom the more nervous she became. At one point she even stood directly in front of the door, blocking me. When I finally was able to enter the room, I was horrified at my discovery. It smelled like shit, and not my shit either. No, this was a different, unknown aroma. So here I am, nose deep in an awful smell, my girlfriend next to me crying. I get PISSED. I ask her where the guy is, who he is and how long this has been going on. All she does is look back at me with tear-filled eyes and confusion as she asks what I'm talking about. I then notice the toilet is clogged and at this point I'm screaming at her about whose feces lay in my toilet bowl. Finally, after what seemed like aeons, she broke down, looked me straight in my eyes and said "babe, it's mine. I told you spicy food doesn't agree with me. " Well, that's all I could handle. I was really hoping she would pull the shower curtain back to reveal a naked man, but instead all I got was an admission that my once beautiful and dainty girlfriend had desecrated my porcelain throne with her dirty whore feces. Needless to say, I packed my belongings up instantly and never looked back. Be careful who you trust.